
Private Valentine: Blonde & Dangerous
“The Army Will Never Be The Same”
Synopsis
Movie star Megan Valentine, characterized as fluffy and bubble‑gum, suddenly finds herself broke and humiliated in the public eye; after leaving the wreckage of a car accident she enlists in the United States Army, hoping it will change her life, but does not succeed.
Credits
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How many hands made this film
The scale of the collaboration
Principal cast & crew: 22
These are the principals we have on file — the full crew ran to the hundreds. Every film this size was made by far more hands than any credits list ever names.
Why a floor?
This is a minimum, not a total. We only count the credits we’ve captured so far, and coverage is uneven — a blockbuster might show a few hundred names while another of the same size shows a couple dozen. The real crews all ran into the thousands. The number here only grows as full credits are enriched — so we frame it as a floor, never a headcount.
Craft leads on file
Edited by Nathan EasterlingShot by Patrick CadyScored by Dennis Smith
Box Office
2008 · Box office
📉 Underperformed — grossed 0.0× its budget
Why 2.5×?
Cinemas keep roughly half of every ticket sold, and a wide release’s marketing often costs about as much again as the film — so a movie needs to gross around 2.5× its production budget just to break even theatrically. It’s a rule of thumb, not the studio’s ledger (home video and streaming come later).
Worldwide gross
$104K
Also known as
- Major Movie Starde
- Private Valentine: Blonde & Dangerousen
- Blonde et dangereusefr
- Pericolosamente biondait
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Cast & Crew
22 unique people credited
Top billed cast
Jessica Simpson
as Private Megan Valentine
Vivica A Fox
as Sergeant Louisa Morely
Steve Guttenberg
as Sidney Green
Aimee Garcia
as Private Vicky Castillo
Olesya Rulin
as Private Petrovich
Keiko Agena
as Private Hailey Hamamori
Jill Marie Jones
as Private Connie Johnson
Ryan Sypek
as Sergeant Mills Evans
Cheri Oteri
as Private Jeter
Gary Grubbs
as Captain Greer
Directors
1Writers
2Producers
4Other crew
5Parents Guide
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